7 Compulsory Life Experiences

Some people have a bucket list or a stack of to do's, some people have regrets and disappointments. 

Being the bossy type, I have a list of 'compulsory life experiences'. Some of these have a cheerful tick in the 'done' box, others not so much.
Some of these experiences are once only deals, others are secret attempts to build good habits through successes. Some have nothing to do with success and a whole lot more to do with being alive. You will notice that my list is not so much about 'exactness' more about 'approach'. I believe that our imagination for what is possible can be far outstripped by reality.
Read my bossy list, then tell me your own 'compulsory life experiences'. I'm not shy about taking on other peoples ideas:)

Compulsory life Experiences

My outside home

• Adopt a 'wilderness': I don't mean this in a 'take responsibility' kind of way, though that is fine too. I simply mean, find somewhere outside, preferably where nature still has more sway than the lawn mower and make it your place. Become familiar with its terrain, go there to relax. Begin to associate it with a 'blissed out' sensation. Maybe it is close to home, maybe it is home, perhaps it is far away and you can get there only with effort. Either way, connect with this place and build a  home for yourself outside of the four walls.
• Follow it through to the end: I don't care what it is, for once in your life (or maybe the hundredth time) just finish something through to the end. Finish the project with as much passion and detail and commitment as you had at the start when it was shiny and new and no obstacles were on the horizon. Everyone should enjoy this feeling of completion without regrets.
• Be healthy: Wouldn't it be a shame to move through your adult life without ever being as healthy as you can. Not once looking at your movement and your diet and your addictions. Don't be this person, make at LEAST one period of your life where you can look and say, I am at my peak health right now. 
• Pursue a Passion: No, don't just stalk someone you fancy. That is not legal in most countries. Spend more time doing something you love. Whether it be sporty, artistic, altruistic or domestic. Just spend more time on it. 
• Love someone: I mean actual love, not romantic love. I mean good for you and good for them, not selfish love. This needs to be experienced.
• Focus on kindness: Life is always better with kindness, whether you are on the giving or receiving end. It is always better.
• Go somewhere amazing as often as you can: It might not be in another country or even another city (though that would be cool), just somewhere that inspires wonder.

The side of the Mountain

Food for thought;

'To live only for some future goal is shallow. 

It's the sides of the mountain that sustains life, not the top'

                                                         - Robert M Pirsig

Admittedly this is quite an insight for the time of night I am writing this post, but it does resonate.

It is so deceptively easy to focus your eyes on the goal and miss the scenery on the way. Even more worrying, is that sometimes our eyes are on a goal that has past its used by date, or no longer relevant in our lives. What then?

So what is on the side of the mountain? 

I am pretty far from being a Zen master, or any type of guru at all (though obviously my family and friends would argue that point...NOT!), however I do think I need to have a crack at answering that question. 

Though another thought, this one courtesy of Buddha,  makes me think it does not matter so much what is on 'our Mountains', so long as we are 'awake' to experience it.

Speaking of which, all this deep thinking has made me sleepy......night night.


To increase the 'Zen' in your life, check out Zentips for more great quotes.

What to forget to improve your day

Normally my penchant for forgetfulness is not that great. I forget friends birthdays, appointments, LOTS of things my husband asks me to do and a whole other array of mundane tasks.

Sometimes, just occasionally, my forgetful mind works in my favour. In honour of this I have compiled a list of 'Great moments in forgetting', hopefully I have remembered to put them all in.....


Great Moments in Forgetting:

• Forgetting to pack my kindle charger for a weekend away: This forgetting moment speaks directly to my reading addiction. Ice Caps could melt and I still would not have tired of reading. While initially sparking panic and even hyperventilation, this forgetting opens up whole new possibilities for my time. Perhaps I could even go outside?
• Forgetting to weigh myself in the morning: Lets just assume the best eh? Probably won't matter if I sneak a few chocolate bars today.
• Forgetting what was said after a couple of wines: If neither of us can remember, I say it does not matter.
• Forgetting I was cranky yesterday: Enough said, lets have a better day. I call this one 'letting go by omission'. 
• Forgetting I have gone 'gluten free': Not great to permanently forget this one, but can be helpful when faced with fresh baked bread.....
• Forgetting your worries: Usually achieved through total immersion in something (or someone) you love. This one can be lovely.
• Forgetting my Camera: Recording moments for posterity is wonderful, but so is coming out from behind the lense and actually experiencing them.

There are so many times when forgetting can open up your day in unexpected ways...... just remember to appreciate what comes, or at the very least enjoy rolling your eyes in dismay.

Words I love

Joy....love....optimism....revel....wonder

I have ALWAYS been a wordy girl. For as long as I remember I have loved words and the emotions they can evoke.

I have never agreed with the old playground chant 'Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me'. Words can be so powerful, both for good and, well frankly, evil.

My favourite words use their power for good. I have had a crack at finding images from my own photography to illustrate some of my favourite words. I hope you can relate. Let me know your favorite

words (for good or for evil), or even if some different words pop up for you when you view this post.

What to tell your inner child

Recently I seem to be reading more and more articles about wisdom people wish they had as a child, teenager or younger adult.
I get it, I do. But I also think 'I'm not dead yet' and 'it is never too late to learn'. With this is mind, here are some lessons I would like my 'inner child' to learn.

Do yourself a favour, learn this now.

• You can ALWAYS choose your response.
• Kindness starts with you.
• Don't think to avoid acting, don't act to avoid thinking.
• If it is important, be consistent.
• Be a friend.
• Don't empower your inner critic.
• Know what you are good at.
• Do what you are good at, so long as you love it.
• Don't be put off by 'the hard yards'.
• Foster your optimism.
• Be gentle with other people, everyone has their own 'stuff'.

There is so much to know and so much wisdom in the world, but you have to start somewhere. Just as soon as my inner child has a handle on these points, she can do up some flash cards for me.

Starting now, what wisdom would you like to have on board?

Humour Me :)

'You can't force funny.

But you can choose when you laugh. '

Recently, I went for a job interview, quite unexpectedly as it turns out. A 'casual chat' with a potential employer very quickly turned serious and probing. Yikes!
Mid interview, I remembered some advice from my husband, which went something like this....

 'Don't try to be funny.'

Good advice indeed for a job interview, but it got me thinking, what exactly did he mean by 'try to be funny'? One aspect of my personality I have always been confident in is my sense of humour and up until this point no one has seen fit to disillusion me on this front. Yet I was getting the sense that my life partner was trying to tell me something.... something I maybe did not want to know.

Rather than be deflated by the thought that I was not bringing the funny on the home front, I decided to work harder to make the man LAUGH. Obviously he must have been experiencing too much stress at work.

Here were some of my more inspired ideas:

The laugh list:

• Dress as a 1950's housewife and offer slippers and whiskey when Hubby arrives home. (Then remembered I already tried this and it freaked him out... a lot).
• Plastic wrap the toilet seat...... wait I would have to clean this up. Far too gross. Also very cliched.

Ummm.... that was my whole list.... and it was pathetic.

As usual when trying to teach someone else a lesson, I learnt a lesson myself. You can't force funny.

But you can choose when you laugh. 

Why was I so worried about making someone else laugh or whether they thought I was a comic genius? In terms of a better life, perhaps looking after my own giggles is more important.

I have decided to not torture my husband into laughing at my jokes, instead I am planning my humour resurgence in a different way. I am looking at the lighter and brighter side of life more often. It is a choice that is increasing the laugh lines around my eyes but leaving my forehead smooth.

Gut Feelings

"....a link between my brain and my gut, call me crazy, but that seems about right."

I am always surprised when it occurs to scientists that there are odd and unexpected (to them at least) relationships between various ailments, symptoms and even treatments. For a significant length of time it has been evident to me that for better or for worse, various parts (if not all) of our bodies share a relationship. Indeed in the Chinese Traditional Medicine world, the idea that the body is a system of interrelated parts and processes has been assumed for longer that many countries have been in existence!

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The spark for this train of thought was an article I read today linking various mental ills (such as depression, anxiety etc) with irritable bowel syndrome.

Hmmmm, let me see, a link between my brain and my gut, call me crazy, but that seems about right. Even popular culture seems to endorse this one, ever have a gut feeling? Ever feel sick to your stomach about an upcoming (scary) event? Ever get the shits with someone? Have you ever had a sad day and just felt 'crappy'? Okay, maybe that is enough poo references for one post.

As a person who has struggled both with anxiety and irritable bowel I am actually really impressed to have a link confirmed outside of my own suspicions (never trust someone who is both suspicious and anxious).

To me these links are clues to follow to eventual freedom from these ills.  Like a two for one offer, perhaps if you can improve one aspect of your health you will gain other less obvious wellness benefits.

As a direct result of this snippet of health gold, I am revisiting previous posts to regain motivation to improve my digestive health and perhaps reap other FABULOUS life rewards as well.

Check out these other diet related posts... I will be :)

Hunting the Cave Man
Step 1: What can I Eat?
Mark Sisson's Masterpiece