Wednesday 16 October 2013

On Giving up.

No one likes a quitter, least of all when we are judging ourselves.

Being fearful of quitting, or 'giving up', is not a good enough reason to keep going. Acknowledging that it is 'Quitting time' can be harder than persevering and ask more of our courage and resilience than we can comfortably give.

Recently I have been forced into rethinking a venture that I have invested much time and effort and self into, leading me down a path of self recrimination and denial.
Why, I ask the universe, do we hold on so tight, when
Are you sure it's a good idea?

letting go is the logical and healthy answer?

Here are my thoughts, I would love to hear yours (universe and reader alike:)

  • Ego:  We have not learned to keep our endeavours and ourselves separate. We need to remember , we are not our jobs or our friends or our families. We are certainly not our successes or failures. 
  • We HATE being wrong: Seriously, do we need to label letting go and moving on as being wrong? The venture/ relationship/ idea may not have borne the fruit we envisaged, but I bet you have benefitted from the effort.
  • 'But I told people I was doing this?': People will have their own ideas about your decision. Some people will be sad for you, some people will be laughing in their hands, most people will be too busy worrying about their own 'stuff' to think about yours. Don't let potential embarrassment stand between you and your better life.
  • Fear: It is painful, when you have visualised your future one way, to let go of that story and start again. Who knows though, when you make space in your life you DO have the choice to fill it with something awesome. 
So here I am, letting go. I do feel sad and disappointed. I do feel just a little bit like a failure and that I have wasted my time.
The bit of my brain that is not absorbed in these thoughts however, is already contemplating the cool stuff I might do now..... 

Sunday 13 October 2013

Not Sleeping.... visualising

I am getting to it......
I love a good band wagon and I will admit to finding myself frequently inspired to try something new.... especially if it boasts life changing results (think Anthony Robins on a total gym 2000 wearing caffeine infused workout pants). It is the reason I avoid late night infomercials. Regular watching could bankrupt me!

Another sadder admission is that my band wagon jumping happens in extreme slow motion. I am 'the sloth' of uptake.
If I had a mantra it would be 'better late than never', but I don't, I haven't gotten around to that yet. Sigh.

While I can laugh about running my life in slow motion, it is not actually a great approach. I am the first to admit not getting much done leads to other problems, such as anxiety and lack of self belief.

Not being able to point to an achievement with, if not pride, at least ownership is not empowering.
It is, frankly, disappointing.


One bandwagon I have been thinking about for years, is the practice of visualisation.
This practice, so say its adherents, is key to real success in any area of life. Anything in life, after all, is created first in your thoughts. Seems like a good place to 'kick start' from!

My own thoughts on visualisation are simple;



  • Don't cheapen the process with focus on expensive things. While a lavish lifestyle might be a lovely result of success, is it really the point?
  • First spend some time uncovering your own values. I can't imagine committing to visualising anything that either seems contrary to my own life view, or simply does not 'float my boat'.
  • When you have the 'what' sorted out, spend some time writing down your visualisation script, otherwise it is too easy (for me anyway) to run off course and end up day dreaming.
  • Find time by yourself, it is NOT empowering to be asked to make a sandwich mid script!
I am visualising 'doing the work' at the moment. I am hoping that this is one case where I can really, and without a hint of irony, say 'better late than never'.



Sunday 26 May 2013

The Daily Drift

Jellyfish are built for drift, they move with the currents and the tides in beautiful clusters of life constantly in gentle motion.
Drifting is great for Jellyfish, but what about people?

Is there anything really wrong with 'going with the flow', or seeing where life takes you?

If drifting for you means remaining open to opportunity, not creating attachments to soul sapping endeavours and allowing exploration to the edges of your journey, then drift.

If your drifting is aimless however, the anxious and unsatisfied squirming in your gut should be answer enough.







Monday 20 May 2013

Om, and other important life decisions

'Beware: Currently experiencing meditation desperation'

I am desperate to start meditating, (yes I see a certain irony in that comment).
The idea of spending some time alone, in peace, unsnarling the knots in my mind is beyond appealing, it seems, well, necessary.

I have downloaded some meditations to try and am ready to get on with it. Only small problem is finding this elusive and mystical 'alone time'. The times I have available to me are after 10pm and before 5am, both time frames rife with the risk of snoozing rather than meditating.

What to do? Any ideas? Is it necessary to meditate everyday to benefit? Am I being a sook about the times available?

I'm off to do some meditation investigation, I will keep you posted.

Friday 17 May 2013

Where do you find the time (AND the energy)?

'If I have the time, I can't be bothered'

It may come as a surprise for anyone who has read  multiple posts from this blog to learn that I have just taken the plunge and returned to work.
Better with Beats:)
Although beside the point, it also is the source of my recent time and motivation problems.
Basically the problem is this.... If I have the time to do the mundane tasks in my day, I can't be Bothered.
If I am honest, I am starting the restent the tedium of the cleaning and washing and folding and making and cooking and doing that falls (quite fairly) to me.
I am sure that this feeling is common amongst many working (or not) women and men, despite this I hope that there is a different choice to make around this.
In the meantime, I am strapping on my headphones, loading up some music with a beat and getting into it.


................................................................................................................................................................


Much, much later..... remind me, less whining and more doing stuff with headphones on in future. As usual, it is the thinking, and not the action that is the real problem. Cleaning is done and dare I say it, I actually had some fun (cringe) dance cleaning.
I think I might actually be a genius, for confirmation see The Best Week of My Life, where I make public my 'dance cleaning' ideas:)

Tuesday 30 April 2013

The Daily Thirty

Here is a question, how late is too late in your day to exercise?
So far I have been a pretty good daily 30 adherent (as I should be on day one of the Daily 30 mission), I have written, (doing it right now as a matter of fact), I have played, I have worked on my business....... but somehow I have managed to get from 6am to 9pm without doing ANY exercise!

What to do? My lazy side (which has obviously been in charge for most of the day) is saying the cause is lost, at least for today.
So tell me, what are your thoughts? Is the effort more important that the possible sleep affecting impacts? Or should I know when to call it quits?

Sunday 28 April 2013

Ideas without follow through? Pointless.....

I think that since I have started blogging my subconscious has had a bit of a panic attack.
Not that I am judgemental of its' concerns, after all I do have some track record of starting projects and then realising months, if not years later that I have not given said project any thought in, well, months or years.
This panic attack has manifested in a great eruption of advice and thoughts to be extracted from my mind and recorded before this whole blogging thing is forgotten too (or so the fear goes).
Problem is, I have discovered that I have written so many things to do, with no follow through.
As soon as one idea is down in print, I have moved onto the next without so much as a backward glance, or even a dot point implementation plan.
This is not progress! This is the brain equivalent of bureaucratic red tape.
 'You must not attempt any self improvement until ALL ideas have been logged, recorded and evaluated.'
Never one to listen to the 'Man', I am rebelling and taking on one previously blogged challenge this week. Heck, if all goes well I might even try another one next week! Take that, mental volcano!
Taking inspiration from my post The best week of my life I am going to incorporate the daily 30 into my week. That's 30 minutes exercise, 30 minutes playing, 30 minutes working on my business and 30 minutes writing.
The challenge will be time, as it always is. I might have to revisit my plan to rise earlier everyday as well........


Sunday 21 April 2013

Crushing the Cranky

'choosing your mood is one of lifes super powers'

Apparently for breakfast this morning I ate a bowl of 'Cranky Cow' oats followed by a large cup of 'Don't push me!' coffee. 
Wow, I am in a BAD mood. EVERYTHING and EVERYONE is annoying me. 
My child does not know how close I was to sending him to his room for drinking milk....... and breathing loudly at the same time! Obviously this kind of behaviour cannot be tolerated!

Hmmmm.... perhaps I need have a little look at my own good self and figure out how to untie the cranky knot I can feel in my gut before I ruin everyone's day.

So what to do? Here is a list of things I am trying, in real time. I will let you know how I go. My approach is going to be from no effort (hope this one works) upwards until I have sorted my cranky mind out.

  1. Breathe slowly and count backwards from 10: Lets see..... can still feel cranky knot. Am not likely to lash out in the next ten seconds, but all bets are off after that. Probably good for emergency cranky intervention, but not longer term mood alteration.
  2. Make a masking tape line of the floor and step over it: Could not immediately find masking tape which was frustrating, ended up just putting a ruler on the floor and stepping over it. Imagined that I was crossing the line between a good mood and a bad one. Strangely enough, I do feel a bit happier. My brain is weird.
  3. Cutting out the caffeine: It strikes me that perhaps my mood and the knotty feeling inside might be related to too much caffeine this morning. Can't give you immediate results on this one, but am cutting it out for the day. Might make me serene:)
  4. Put on some music: Just opened Pandora on my iphone (best app in the world) and switched to the 'Pop' channel. Can do this because no one is home I have to pretend I have good music taste for. Wait....wait.... think I might have just smiled. :)
  5. For the first time ever.... I am trying laughing yoga: Or my version of it. Hope my kids don't hear me. (after) Well that was strange. I was really expecting fake laughter to merge into real laughter after time. Did. not. happen. Maybe this is better when you are watching other people fake laugh as well. In the end, it became apparent that making the 'ha ha ha ha' sound was helping with my breathing though so I kept it up regardless. Do feel better after some rounds of salute to the sun. 
After completing the above, I would describe my mood as optimistically neutral. I can work with that. Might even be able to watch my kids eat lunch without having a melt down.

I would love to hear your approaches to mood improvement, after all, choosing your mood is one of lifes super powers.

Sunday 14 April 2013

7 Compulsory Life Experiences

Some people have a bucket list or a stack of to do's, some people have regrets and disappointments. 
Being the bossy type, I have a list of 'compulsory life experiences'. Some of these have a cheerful tick in the 'done' box, others not so much.
Some of these experiences are once only deals, others are secret attempts to build good habits through successes. Some have nothing to do with success and a whole lot more to do with being alive. You will notice that my list is not so much about 'exactness' more about 'approach'. I believe that our imagination for what is possible can be far outstripped by reality.
Read my bossy list, then tell me your own 'compulsory life experiences'. I'm not shy about taking on other peoples ideas:)

Compulsory life Experiences


My outside home

  • Adopt a 'wilderness': I don't mean this in a 'take responsibility' kind of way, though that is fine too. I simply mean, find somewhere outside, preferably where nature still has more sway than the lawn mower and make it your place. Become familiar with its terrain, go there to relax. Begin to associate it with a 'blissed out' sensation. Maybe it is close to home, maybe it is home, perhaps it is far away and you can get there only with effort. Either way, connect with this place and build a  home for yourself outside of the four walls.
  • Follow it through to the end: I don't care what it is, for once in your life (or maybe the hundredth time) just finish something through to the end. Finish the project with as much passion and detail and commitment as you had at the start when it was shiny and new and no obstacles were on the horizon. Everyone should enjoy this feeling of completion without regrets.
  • Be healthy: Wouldn't it be a shame to move through your adult life without ever being as healthy as you can. Not once looking at your movement and your diet and your addictions. Don't be this person, make at LEAST one period of your life where you can look and say, I am at my peak health right now. 
  • Pursue a Passion: No, don't just stalk someone you fancy. That is not legal in most countries. Spend more time doing something you love. Whether it be sporty, artistic, altruistic or domestic. Just spend more time on it. 
  • Love someone: I mean actual love, not romantic love. I mean good for you and good for them, not selfish love. This needs to be experienced.
  • Focus on kindness: Life is always better with kindness, whether you are on the giving or receiving end. It is always better.
  • Go somewhere amazing as often as you can: It might not be in another country or even another city (though that would be cool), just somewhere that inspires wonder.



Thursday 11 April 2013

The side of the Mountain

Food for thought;


'To live only for some future goal is shallow. 
It's the sides of the mountain that sustains life, not the top'

                                                         - Robert M Pirsig

Admittedly this is quite an insight for the time of night I am writing this post, but it does resonate.
It is so deceptively easy to focus your eyes on the goal and miss the scenery on the way. Even more worrying, is that sometimes our eyes are on a goal that has past its used by date, or no longer relevant in our lives. What then?

So what is on the side of the mountain? 

I am pretty far from being a Zen master, or any type of guru at all (though obviously my family and friends would argue that point...NOT!), however I do think I need to have a crack at answering that question. 

Though another thought, this one courtesy of Buddha,  makes me think it does not matter so much what is on 'our Mountains', so long as we are 'awake' to experience it.
Speaking of which, all this deep thinking has made me sleepy......night night.


To increase the 'Zen' in your life, check out Zentips for more great quotes.

Monday 8 April 2013

What to forget to improve your day


Normally my penchant for forgetfulness is not that great. I forget friends birthdays, appointments, LOTS of things my husband asks me to do and a whole other array of mundane tasks.

Sometimes, just occasionally, my forgetful mind works in my favour. In honour of this I have compiled a list of 'Great moments in forgetting', hopefully I have remembered to put them all in.....


Great Moments in Forgetting:

  • Forgetting to pack my kindle charger for a weekend away: This forgetting moment speaks directly to my reading addiction. Ice Caps could melt and I still would not have tired of reading. While initially sparking panic and even hyperventilation, this forgetting opens up whole new possibilities for my time. Perhaps I could even go outside?
  • Forgetting to weigh myself in the morning: Lets just assume the best eh? Probably won't matter if I sneak a few chocolate bars today.
  • Forgetting what was said after a couple of wines: If neither of us can remember, I say it does not matter.
  • Forgetting I was cranky yesterday: Enough said, lets have a better day. I call this one 'letting go by omission'. 
  • Forgetting I have gone 'gluten free': Not great to permanently forget this one, but can be helpful when faced with fresh baked bread.....
  • Forgetting your worries: Usually achieved through total immersion in something (or someone) you love. This one can be lovely.
  • Forgetting my Camera: Recording moments for posterity is wonderful, but so is coming out from behind the lense and actually experiencing them.
There are so many times when forgetting can open up your day in unexpected ways...... just remember to appreciate what comes, or at the very least enjoy rolling your eyes in dismay.

Sunday 7 April 2013

Words I love


Joy....love....optimism....revel....wonder

I have ALWAYS been a wordy girl. For as long as I remember I have loved words and the emotions they can evoke.
I have never agreed with the old playground chant 'Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me'. Words can be so powerful, both for good and, well frankly, evil.

My favourite words use their power for good. I have had a crack at finding images from my own photography to illustrate some of my favourite words. I hope you can relate. Let me know your favorite
words (for good or for evil), or even if some different words pop up for you when you view this post.





Wednesday 3 April 2013

What to tell your inner child

Recently I seem to be reading more and more articles about wisdom people wish they had as a child, teenager or younger adult.
I get it, I do. But I also think 'I'm not dead yet' and 'it is never too late to learn'. With this is mind, here are some lessons I would like my 'inner child' to learn.


Do yourself a favour, learn this now.


  • You can ALWAYS choose your response.
  • Kindness starts with you.
  • Don't think to avoid acting, don't act to avoid thinking.
  • If it is important, be consistent.
  • Be a friend.
  • Don't empower your inner critic.
  • Know what you are good at.
  • Do what you are good at, so long as you love it.
  • Don't be put off by 'the hard yards'.
  • Foster your optimism.
  • Be gentle with other people, everyone has their own 'stuff'.

There is so much to know and so much wisdom in the world, but you have to start somewhere. Just as soon as my inner child has a handle on these points, she can do up some flash cards for me.

Starting now, what wisdom would you like to have on board?



Tuesday 2 April 2013

Humour Me :)


'You can't force funny.
But you can choose when you laugh. '

Recently, I went for a job interview, quite unexpectedly as it turns out. A 'casual chat' with a potential employer very quickly turned serious and probing. Yikes!
Mid interview, I remembered some advice from my husband, which went something like this....

 'Don't try to be funny.'

Good advice indeed for a job interview, but it got me thinking, what exactly did he mean by 'try to be funny'? One aspect of my personality I have always been confident in is my sense of humour and up until this point no one has seen fit to disillusion me on this front. Yet I was getting the sense that my life partner was trying to tell me something.... something I maybe did not want to know.

Rather than be deflated by the thought that I was not bringing the funny on the home front, I decided to work harder to make the man LAUGH. Obviously he must have been experiencing too much stress at work.

Here were some of my more inspired ideas:

The laugh list:

  • Dress as a 1950's housewife and offer slippers and whiskey when Hubby arrives home. (Then remembered I already tried this and it freaked him out... a lot).
  • Plastic wrap the toilet seat...... wait I would have to clean this up. Far too gross. Also very cliched.
Ummm.... that was my whole list.... and it was pathetic.

As usual when trying to teach someone else a lesson, I learnt a lesson myself. You can't force funny.
But you can choose when you laugh. 

Why was I so worried about making someone else laugh or whether they thought I was a comic genius? In terms of a better life, perhaps looking after my own giggles is more important.

I have decided to not torture my husband into laughing at my jokes, instead I am planning my humour resurgence in a different way. I am looking at the lighter and brighter side of life more often. It is a choice that is increasing the laugh lines around my eyes but leaving my forehead smooth.

Monday 1 April 2013

Gut Feelings

"....a link between my brain and my gut, call me crazy, but that seems about right."

I am always surprised when it occurs to scientists that there are odd and unexpected (to them at least) relationships between various ailments, symptoms and even treatments. For a significant length of time it has been evident to me that for better or for worse, various parts (if not all) of our bodies share a relationship. Indeed in the Chinese Traditional Medicine world, the idea that the body is a system of interrelated parts and processes has been assumed for longer that many countries have been in existence!




+







The spark for this train of thought was an article I read today linking various mental ills (such as depression, anxiety etc) with irritable bowel syndrome.

Hmmmm, let me see, a link between my brain and my gut, call me crazy, but that seems about right. Even popular culture seems to endorse this one, ever have a gut feeling? Ever feel sick to your stomach about an upcoming (scary) event? Ever get the shits with someone? Have you ever had a sad day and just felt 'crappy'? Okay, maybe that is enough poo references for one post.

As a person who has struggled both with anxiety and irritable bowel I am actually really impressed to have a link confirmed outside of my own suspicions (never trust someone who is both suspicious and anxious).

To me these links are clues to follow to eventual freedom from these ills.  Like a two for one offer, perhaps if you can improve one aspect of your health you will gain other less obvious wellness benefits.

As a direct result of this snippet of health gold, I am revisiting previous posts to regain motivation to improve my digestive health and perhaps reap other FABULOUS life rewards as well.

Check out these other diet related posts... I will be :)

Hunting the Cave Man
Step 1: What can I Eat?
Mark Sisson's Masterpiece


Tuesday 26 March 2013

The Best Week of my Life

In my family there is a history of second sight, communicating with the spirits and other general oddness.
Unfortunately I do not have any of this supernatural trickery up my sleeve, but you can believe me when I say that I have seen into the future. What I have seen is for my immediate future is the best week ever... starting now.
I only know this because I have come up with no less that seven actions to make it happen. I am creating for me, the BEST WEEK EVER (read with drum rolls in place).
Here is my plan;


Best Week Plan


  • Write creatively daily, use a short story contest as inspiration. 
  • Listen to my children when they speak with me, don't multi-task my parenting!
  • Be unexpectedly nice to my husband. Might make him suspicious, but what the heck.
  • Be outside with my Camera, alone. 
  • Make sure I always have music on when I clean. Dance cleaning is so much more fun than silent cleaning.
  • Start a diary, no more getting caught out! (I am always getting caught out forgetting things).
  • Get my daily groups of 30. 30 minutes exercise, thirty minutes playing, thirty minutes writing and 30 minutes working on my business.
  • Make sure I gut laugh every day. Seek out opportunities to really laugh, include my family in my laughing. 

If this list were a colour it would be a nice optimistic yellow, if it were a drink it would be champagne (with no hangover, just the 'special occasion' vibe), if it were a time of day it would be eleven am, just in time for a cuppa and a piece of cake. It is a smiley, feel good list, thus I am assuming it will make for a smiley and feel good week.

Have you even planned to increase the 'joy quota' in your life? What did you do? Did it work out?
Happiness, joy and optimism, like anything worth having in life, require nurturing and work. Let me know your strategies to nurture your own 'upside'. 

Tuesday 12 March 2013

Be Inspiring

Inspiration is a tricky and transient beast. It's visits can be frequent, but too often brief.
What good is inspiration that is short lived? What good is a start without a middle and where appropriate an end? More importantly what good is an inspiring start without an equally inspiring ongoing journey?

I love the feeling of being inspired, it is exciting and motivating and uplifting. It promotes optimism about the future and action in the present moment.
It gets things started. Think Harry Potter, product of a moment of inspiration on a train that spawned an empire for author J K Rowling and kick started a love of reading for millions of children (and adults) the world over. Inspiration, with follow through, can produce big results!
Harnessing and using this super power is a secret that is understood by few and used by even less. 
So how can we inspire ourselves and what could we achieve if we could maintain our inspiration for longer?
Here are a few ideas to get you started on the track to an inspired life.
Inspiration: Action, Joy, Optimism
  • Do something you are good at EVERYDAY. Not only will it make you feel great about your day, but you are increasing your chances of inspiration to strike where you can make a real difference.
  • Identify what makes you feel optimistic, do it! For me I feel inspired and optimistic by reading words authored by inspiring people.
  • Set some small achievable goals, get them done. Don't bite off too much, just get into the habit of succeeding. 
  • Look after your health, or as Stephen Covey puts it in his book "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People', 'Sharpen the Saw', you won't be ready to embrace inspiration if you are falling apart physically. Of course this one might be the subject of one of your little goals.
  • When inspiration finds you, examine it and if appropriate embrace it. Give yourself the chance to be inspiring. This is such a kindness to yourself. 
  • Be prepared that motivation around your inspired life will wax and wane, preparation means you are in charge of kick starting the motivation  and inspiration again. That's right, you are in charge.
I'm tackling these ideas at the moment and I am feeling optimism and motivation and can do-ability. I even feel confident enough to start making up words:)
Good luck with your own inspiration, please share your own tips and tricks for inspiring yourself and others.

Tuesday 5 March 2013

Broadening my blogging Horizons.

Moving ahead
The more I write this blog, the more I realise that I don't want my writing to be purely about migraines. Although migraines have shaped the way I live my life and how I feel about myself, I don't necessarily want to give them power over my future.
I want to write and think about enjoying my life (with emphasis on the word 'joy'). This does include dealing with migraines and the sneaky thought patterns that they have engendered, but, come on, there is more to my life and my health and my identity than just being a migraine sufferer. Ironically however, I think writing about my migraine experience has been instrumental in helping me move past this sole focus to a more inclusive view. With this is mind I encourage anyone who is dealing with chronic health interests to at the very least journal about it, the impact on your own power is incredible.
As a result of this thought process, you will find the scope of my posts will broaden, but the intent behind them, to live fully and in a healthy and happy way, will not.
I. Can't. Wait.

Monday 4 March 2013

Got Sleep?

One of my most reliable migraine triggers (can a bad thing be reliable?) is lack of sleep.
I have been quite lucky up until recently, I have been the person who climbs into bed, stretches, shuffles around and then promptly falls asleep.
In the last month or so however, something has changed. For some reason, as yet unknown, I find myself tossing and turning into the wee hours of the morning with no sleep in sight. Aside from an increasing sleep debt (which only so many afternoon naps available), I am worried about the impact on the frequency of migraine attacks. In the usual run of things, increasing fatigue has been the pre-cursor to increasing migraines.
Being the proactive person that I now am, I have taken matters into my own hands (or in this case someone else's hands) and looked into solutions for my growing insomnia.
This week I have tried to work on the 'comfort' of my body. I have noticed that I am finding it hard to get comfy in my bed. My shoulders and hips ache, my neck and head hurt and even my jaw seems to be piping up with complaints.
In response to this I decided to take harsh action.... and get a massage! Monday morning finds me sitting in the the local Chinese Massage Therapy establishment with a lovely young lady call Viv doing her best to work out the knots in my shoulders.
Let me tell you Viv worked hard! Solidly pummelling and kneading my neck and shoulders for half an hour, only pausing to comment 'That must hurt' or 'I heard that muscle crunch'.
I bravely endured this treatment until the desire to fall asleep overcame the desire to be massaged further at which point Viv called it a morning.
I tell you, I left that appointment walking on air, confident that for the first time in weeks my relaxed body would not drift but plummet into deep sleep. Ha!
I am sure this would have been the case if my shoulders did not gradually develop the feeling of having been beaten with a phone book (leaving no bruises) over the course of the afternoon. Who would have thought that deep tissue massage could have as painful repercussions as say, going 5 rounds with iron Mike Tyson?
Oh well, next on my list to try is binaural beats, at the very least I am expecting no extra discomfort! I will keep you posted.

Tuesday 26 February 2013

Getting fit despite (to spite) my migraines.

A recent problem I have noticed is that I seem to get migraines after vigorous exercise.
To often to ignore, my vision will flick into the classic migraine aura roughly two hours after staggering back through the front door post a hard cardio effort.
Worse than that, I have found that the threat of getting a migraine has put me off exercising at all. A bit too convenient for a self professed couch potato.
Migraines can be triggered by exercise
Not now aura, I've got my burn on!
This can't go on for ever, or I will become one of those individuals that has to get a crane in to pry their body out of their bedroom to transport them to hospital.
You guessed it, I have found something else to change in my daily approach!
It seems to me that joining a gym or the like might be counter productive as well as (for me anyway) boring. Most classes offered would be out of the question as they (rightly) push participants well into the huffy puffy zone.
I have decided rather to incorporate incidental exercise into my life, aiming for a minimum of 30 minutes of incidental exercise a day. With a bit of planning this is a target that I should be able to blast through (at a steady pace) on a daily basis.
Walking the kids to school, riding my bike to the shops, squats and lunges on my bosu, mowing the lawn, dancing around to boppy songs. These are all options I enjoy and can be incorporated into my day with no real impact to either my schedule or my head.
The genius who discovered that incidental exercise minutes are as effective as block exercises, is now my new official hero.

Sunday 24 February 2013

The Migraine Zombie

I have recently developed a very 'under the radar' kind of obsession with Zombie books. I love the way Zombies aren't at all appealing, have no sex or sex appeal and cannot be brought over to the good side.
They are the epitome of the 'lost cause'. There is nothing romantic or glamorous about them, they just run around moaning and groaning and gnawing on the odd bit of human flesh.
Aside from the human flesh bit, I think I might relate a bit the poor maligned Zombie. I know what it is like to not be able to communicate because the words won't form properly on my tongue. I also can relate to the whole wandering around moaning and groaning bit, often with the odd stumble thrown in as my fine and gross motor bit is way off.
I do not refer (obviously I hope) to my everyday experience, but to the 'migraine days', days where I definitely have NO good side. Just a nasty temper to match my nasty head.
My Zombie empathy has no useful purpose in terms of a wise and effective way to get less migraines, I am just entertaining myself with the thought of a world overrun with moaning and groaning migraine sufferers.
Maybe workplace and pharmaceutical companies would start taking our ailment seriously? Perhaps our sudden power base would generate respect and concern?
Or perhaps in the way of the great Zombie reads, the unaffected would triumph eventually and we would still be left out in the cold?

If you are also a Zombie fan, here is a list of my favourite Zombie reads, nothing like a bit of escapist reading to perk you up! Plus another upside, stories where the hero triumphs over really really bad odds can motivate you to succeed against your own really really bad odds:

The Remaining, By D J Molles
The Remaining: Aftermath
The Remaining: Refugees
Apocalypse Z: The Beginning of the end By Manel Loureiro
No Easy Hope (Surviving the Dead) by James Cook
This Shattered Land (Surviving the Dead)


Wednesday 20 February 2013

Closing the Accountability Gap

Be accountable for you health
Lack of Accountability will shipwreck your change...
Have you ever noticed that when you are feeling your least energetic and the most confused about the way forward (which happens on a disturbingly regular basis to me anyway) there is always a BIG disconnect between the way you have decided to live and your actual life.
Hence the confusion. Your own mind and body does not know whether to trust you. 
But the mind and body are not helpless children, they are constantly sending messages, questioning lifestyle and life choices.
Usually, subtly like, WTF are you doing? We are going to shut you down until you start making sense!
Believe me, they follow through! Depression, lethargy, confusion and even physical ills such as stomach upsets, headaches and nausea
So how to trump the sneaky mind and even sneakier body when they are wielding powers you did not even know they had?
Win back their trust, be accountable for your word. If you say you are doing something, make sure you are. If you are talking the talk, make sure you ARE walking that walk.
You will be surprised how quickly your mind and body will get on board when you hold yourself accountable for your own choices.
Here are some quick accountability tools:

  • Enlist a buddy who knows what you are doing and will call you on your progress.
  • Break down your change into little steps. There are so many cliches around this one I will leave you to fill in the blanks.
  • If you slip up and step outside your area of accountability, don't torture yourself about it. Just get back on that track (and Walk that Walk).
  • Acknowledge that when you lie in bed at night you feel so much better having been accountable for your life.
Good luck, you know you are.

Saturday 16 February 2013

Trying is for suckers.

I am giving up trying. I have decided trying does not work for me.
As soon as I start to try and make a change, it seems every personal demon in my head which would make the endeavour difficult leaps into action.
Case in point, I have been trying to alter my eating habits to embrace a Primal lifestyle. No additive sugars, processed foods, or things that were not available to our ancestors from the deep dark past.
As my 'trying attempts' usually go, I got off to a very positive start with this process. Did the shop, ate the food, felt the satisfaction.
Then, as per the script, I fell off the wagon into a block of chocolate and a bottle of coke zero.
Feeling very discouraged I have been consoling myself with more of the same. In fact I have been eating a less wholesome diet than I would have been were I not TRYING to go primal.
See, trying, does. not. work.
So what are my alternatives? If I have given up trying have I also given up endeavouring to improve my health and decrease the hold migraines have on my life?
Nope, I have decided to play a tricky mind game with myself. Instead of trying I am taking up doing.
This week I am not going to try and go Primal, I am just going to be Primal. I am going to think about it less, but do it more.
I am sure this is what the original cave people would have done....
Stay tuned to see if I am successful in my trickery.

Friday 15 February 2013

Who is watching you?


As a part of my quest to get deeper into the issues affecting those with chronic migraines, I have joined a migraine sufferers groups on facebook.

One thing I have discovered I have in common with many members of this group, is the concern about how our children perceive us  because we 'always' get migraines.

Some members have even gone so far as to pretend they are doing something else to avoid letting their children know that they are dealing with ANOTHER migraine.

This got me thinking, how do I deal with this worry? Could I be doing better to help my boys understand what is going on with Mum? Am I setting them up to be able to deal well with their own and other people difficulties?

Out of the mouths of babes.

Earlier this month, I found myself lying on the couch in our lounge area while my four year old played in front of me with some lego. I was still in the aura phase of a migraine and was unable to look at what he was doing because opening my eyes made me want to chuck.
 'I'm sorry I've got a migraine' I said, 'I know it is annoying'.
Little Dude replied, 'You don't have to say sorry Mum, you're not being rude'.
So what am I telling my son through this exchange? Nothing good. Luckily he is smarter than me and didn't buy into the underlying messages of;

  1. I am being annoying because I am sick again.
  2. It is my fault.
  3. You have a right to be cranky with me because I am sick.
  4. I feel guilty because I have a migraine.
These are all completely unhelpful lessons to be teaching my children, and I am sure that this language from me is NOT isolated.
I know it is hard to be switched on mentally when suffering from a migraine, so I need to think in advance what I will say to them when they occur. 
I don't want to send the above messages, and I don't want them to see my illness as limiting me and what I can achieve. 
Problem is I am so mired in actually believing the messages I am sending I am having trouble thinking up alternate conversations. I need your help.
What do you say to your family? How does this help them to understand and appreciate how migraines work?





Thursday 14 February 2013

The 'Kick me in the pants' list

Rise above: 
Do you ever have those days where you just need that little bit of extra motivation, a kick in the pants if you will.
Do you sometimes need a hand up when things are really tough? It is tiring dealing with real life and then trying to do your best through periods of frequent migraines. Sometimes it all seems too difficult to manage.

I have decided to create for myself a list of messages to read on just those sort of days, it goes something a little like this.

  • Remember, this too will pass.
  • Draw a line and step over it.
  • What do you need to do?
  • Why?
  • Work Hard.
  • Admit that you work hard.
  • Look one year past. Look now. Do you see progress?
  • Look one year forwards. Imagine the progress you want.
  • Put some music on.
  • Plan your work.
  • Work your plan (that one's from my Dad)
  • Be who you want to be.
  • Create your life.
  • Don't listen to the bull shit. Especially from yourself.
  • Smile, now get on with it!
  • Let yourself be a bit proud when you do.

Everyone's kick in the pants list would be different I imagine and in mine, to be honest, the order doesn't matter. Just the sentiment. Be proactive. Live deliberately. Be kind to yourself. 
I would love to hear other migraine sufferers lists, what gets you going when the going gets tough?

Wednesday 13 February 2013

Migraines can be Depressing

What, I ask you, could possibly be depressing about having chronic and debilitating migraine pain? It's hard to see isn't it?
While a link between depression and migraine seems almost silly, researchers in Canada have found just that, a link! Astonishing!
Sarcasm aside, it is a little worrying to read that, according to the study undertaken at the University of Calgary, people who suffer from migraines, are up to 20% more likely to also suffer from depression. Darn. That's depressing.

The researchers were unable to determine whether the participants who had both migraines and depression, were depressed because they had migraines or had migraines because they were depressed. Which was the chicken and which was the egg so to speak. I have my own theories on that.

The good news to take out of this story, is that this discovery may open up different avenues for researchers to look into eliminating migraines.
In the mean time, at our level, what does this mean? Is this anything other than a rather obvious observation, for the many of us that have been lucky enough to hit the migraine and depression double?
I think there might be.
In the first instance, at least migraineurs now know there are legitimate reasons to be on the look out for signs of depression when suffering from migraines. A little bit of awareness, especially when family and friends are also in the know, can lead to earlier detection of depression symptoms and therefore earlier and more effective treatment.
In the second instance, perhaps for those stuck in the mire of depression and migraines, some hope can be gleaned from the link. Beating one may have double the benefits, work hard on ridding yourself of migraines may make life lighter and brighter as well.

Details for this post were sourced from  Reuters.

Tuesday 12 February 2013

Mark Sisson's Masterpiece

Mark Sisson, The Primal Connection, book review
A mesmerizing read
In a first for me, I have decided to review a book, The Primal Connection: Follow your genetic blueprint to health and happiness, by Mark Sisson. I can't help it, I really want everyone to read it. I think the world would be a better place if they did. Overkill? Maybe....... or maybe not.

So why Mark's book? Why on a site about Migraine busting? I'll explain.

As those of you who have read previous posts on the topic of going Primal (Hunting the Cave ManThe Giza Approach) will already know, in an effort to banish the migraines from my life, I have started incorporating Primal Eating principles into my day. 'The Primal Connection' is one of the books I decided to read to gain some insight into the Primal approach, and wow, reading this book was like coming home for me.

Like many people I have long been feeling a disconnect with how my life is unfolding, with not so much concious interference from me but soooo much interference from my consumer tendencies. You know what I mean, constantly being influenced by media of all types that what you need is just one purchase away. Until you make that purchase that is.

Honestly, like many others in western cultures, I have been trying to buy my way to a better life. 

This is not a healthy way to live, even for people who do not have chronic health issues. The stress we place on ourselves trying to keep up with our consumer desires (which we have convinced ourselves are needs) can seem to crush our choices around life. For a person with migraines, it can increase the panic around life, born of the need to be successful in this culture, an endeavour made more difficult by poor health.

Mark's book for me, provides a framework to strip away the façade built by modern life and returns the focus back to the individual interacting with the world.

Mark discusses many ways to get in touch with the world, from the literal, bury your hands in the soil, run barefoot, bask in the sun, to the social, develop 'real' friendship networks as distinct from the 'social network'.

It's life like it used to be before everything we ate was processed and everyone thought they needed antibacterial cleaners for every room.

What is surprising about Mark's book however (though it probably shouldn't be) is the amount of research that has gone into developing his position. Page by page, the reader learns why turning back the clock to a less complicated life approach will improve their health. Banishing many modern health problems caused by poor immune systems, and improving many chronic health issues, such as, you guessed it, Migraines.

As the man himself say's, '...life is simply a matter of making choices'. I love the choices presented in this book, and while I don't think I will ever be a barefoot marathon runner, or be able to permanently eschew sugar, I do believe that inspiration should be taken where you find it and there is plenty of it to find between these pages.


A Reason to Succeed

Yesterday I found myself entertaining doubts. Big nasty poo brown doubts that undermined my mission and motivation. The biggest and most cunning of these doubts sounded so real in my mind that I could literally feel my confidence deflate. Have you heard this one?

'You know you can't actually beat these migraines, you just need to accept that they are a big part of your life and move on'

Go on.... leap into action!
See what I mean? It sounds very reasonable doesn't it? More disturbing than that, it might actually be true. 
Doubts and truisms can slow our progress and sometimes, stop us in our tracks, and in doing so our doubts become our reality. See, you were right all along!
Luckily for us however, life is made by choice. A wonderful sentiment from the equally wonderfully book 'Eat Pray Love'  by Elizabeth Gilbert refers to the necessity of 'participating' in your life. Don't just drift in the easy direction, often easy drifting will lead to a difficult life.

To shore up my choice to take action, I have created a list of life experiences I am no longer willing to tolerate. Next time these doubts try a take down on my motivation I will point at this list, shake my head and say 'Not today loser, not today.'


My 'No more!' list

  • Missing social events because of migraines.
  • Sacrificing financial freedom for fear of migraine troubles.
  • Dealing with other people's disappointment when migraines arise.
  • Feeling unwell for days on end in the 'Migraine Hangover' stage.
  • Worrying about what people think because I am frequently unwell.
  • Worrying how my children will view my effectiveness because I get migraines.
  • Being depressed, anxious and unhappy because of cluster migraines.
  • Trying to not be offended when people make thoughtless, ignorant and snide comments about migraines.
  • Listening to my own judgement on why I get migraines.
I could keep going with this list, but there are enough 'NO MORES' there to stiffen my spine.
Perhaps I also need to work on identifying the corresponding positives to this list of 'No mores'?

I would love to hear your 'No mores' or better still your 'More ofs!" What are your reasons to succeed?

Monday 11 February 2013

Not Now! Migraine Interference.

I don't know if it is a migraine thing, or just a me thing, but I have a unhelpful belief in 'Murphy's Law'.
Following are some examples, cases in point if you like, of Mr Murphy in action in my life;


Migraines get in the way of fun
Work it girl.... just not too hard
  • I have started a new job ..... therefore it is obvious I need to get LOTS of migraines, preferably in my first week, so that my employers know right off the bat how I roll.
  • I am doing a four hour trip, alone, with the kids, so now is the perfect time for an aura, right?
  • Dinner party, my house? Sure, bring it on migraine genie.
  • Just had a great long bike ride, really pushed hard. Feel wonderful, I am going to start on marathons next.... what's that strange smell? Oh, that's right, exercise gives me migraines , I forgot. Lead me to the couch.
  • Can't wait to see my friend who has flown in for one day.... on my way out the door, aura. Maybe she wants to come to my house and talk to me in a dark room while I keep my eyes closed?
  • I am having my annual performance review, now is the perfect time for a migraine hit, just in case my boss had forgotten all my days off!
Mr Murphy, you are NOT my friend. 

Okay, that's my weekly complain session over. Now its your turn, let me know the most inconvenient migraine you have had.

Sunday 10 February 2013

Under Construction

Warning: life under construction
Have you ever noticed that pulling on loose threads often results in clothes with holes, or that when tidying out a cluttered cupboard, there is a significant period of time where the cupboard (room, house etc.) looks far worse than the original problem. Often this period coincides beautifully with the moment when the energy and motivation that sparked the endeavour begins to wane.
I am finding this cause and effect paradigm rings true now I am pulling on the 'loose threads' of my health and mind. Thinking about one topic for improvement has spiralled into thinking about everything.
I call it six degrees of life separation (patent pending... ha ha).
A case in point, all this talk of work has me thinking. Have I really removed myself from the (outside of the home) workplace as a result of migraine stress overload? If so, does this mean that if I can remove or manage them better I can go back? Do I want to? Have I really let migraines sabotage my career and finances to that extent?
Significant as this topic is, it is only ONE of the subjects to emerge from the depths of my mind, stirred into action by errant deep thoughts. Talk about opening Pandora's box.
Looking at the situation from a positive perspective, I am taking all this frenzied thinking as a sign that my subconscious mind is completely on board with the idea that change is coming.
I'll just have to get used to the idea that I might be living in a mental construction zone while work continues.




Thursday 7 February 2013

Mayday Mayday....

I have a son who is obsessed with lego.... he would spend every waking moment constructing lego machinery if he was allowed. Earlier in the week he spent an afternoon making a squadron of various flying machines, none of them standard but all pretty cool to his mothers eye.
Migraines can make you crash and burn
Made for a demolition derby
Of course, as happens with lego in the hands of a little boy, pretty soon these marvellous flying machines had all crashed and burned, been rebuilt, modified and crashed and burned again.
It is a bit unfortunate when you have a day that is analogous to broken lego planes, but I have to say I managed to do my own bit of crashing and burning this week. Bits falling off all over the place!
What could trigger a bit of good old fashioned falling apart...... cue the migraine.
I know I have written a little about the mental side of being a part of the long term migraine afflicted population. The feelings of helplessness, hopelessness and guilt that have slithered into my mind over the years. Perhaps not surprisingly I have found writing about this side of the condition enlightening and empowering, which is why I was taken by surprise when all these feelings ambushed me after one measly migraine. One. Oh dear.
The details of what I was thinking are unimportant, what is important however is the bounce back. Bouncing back because I recognised the migraine mind in action. I heard the odd and nasty things my migraine affected mind was whispering in my ears, and while it was not immediate, I am quietly pleased that awareness helped me to turn that bus around. No more one way tickets to the dump I call negative valley.
Hey, awareness may just be King. Long live the King, and long live those friends and family who support you through these times and give awareness a helping hand. (You know you are:)

Small things.

I have always been a person who takes great pleasure out of the 'small things' in life.
You know, when all the songs on the radio happen to be favourites, the shirt I want to wear is mysteriously already ironed, my car seems to have decided to drive like a top gear dream and all the lights are green.
This morning, my small pleasure was breakfast. Out. In a cafe. Alone. So good!
The even better news was that I discovered 'Primal food' was made for breakfast. Eggs and Ham and a cuppa while reading a magazine.
Maybe this Primal thing won't be so hard after all?

Tuesday 5 February 2013

Step 1: What can I eat?

Well, I have had another whole day with my nose buried in all things Primal, excluding perhaps a cave man's armpit.
 It is sooo interesting, who would have thought looking backwards through time would seem to hold so many of the answers to moving forward?
As they say, a little bit of knowledge can be a dangerous thing, and with just a day's worth of information I am fired up to change EVERYTHING!
As they also say, 'Whoa there Tiger, one thing at a time!'
Luckily I decided yesterday to make food my starting point for making the change, so here is a quick overview of what I have discovered about the diet.

1) Lots of things I love to eat... are off the menu! Sigh. A basic list of things to avoid/ exclude is shown below:

    • Grains (including wheat, oats, corn, barley etc)
    • Legumes
    • Dairy
    • Refined sugar (uh oh, I am addicted to this one)
    • Processed foods
    • Salt
    • Refined vegetable oils
2) Some things I love to eat..... are still on the menu:
    • Grass fed meat
    • Fish
    • Fruits and vegetables
    • Eggs
    • Nuts and seeds
    • Some oils including coconut, macadamia, olive and avocado.
Hmmm, as you have read this is quite the overhaul from the usual western diet. Certainly from my usual diet. But I am determined to break through my long held belief ('I won't be able to stick to that!) and give it a red hot go.

I will let you know my first shopping list and menu on Thursday, until then I have a lot of naughty foods in my cupboard to eat my way through (waste not want not!):)

PS: Here are some links I used to get some of the dietary information over and above 'It starts with food'



Monday 4 February 2013

Hunting the Cave Man

I am starting the working week by looking into the Paleo diet and lifestyle, in line with my desire to start at the 'bottom of the pyramid', or the basics if you like, in my search for a migraine free life.
I have decided to try 'Paleo' after reading some really compelling success stories from migraineurs who have experienced significant relief from taking on the approach.
If you are interested in reading some of these success stories, I suggest looking at Mark's Daily Apple. Authored by Mark Sisson, one of the 'founding fathers' of the Paleo or 'Primal' lifestyle. Mark's Daily Apple is the 'go to' Blog for people interested in all things Paleo and one of the main resources I am using to investigate going 'Primal'.
In my last post 'The Giza Approach', I noted that I am not a trained expert when it comes to reviewing or analysing medical or lifestyle choices. I do however consider myself the biggest stakeholder in my own life and as such I choose to be active in finding a better way of dealing with my health. (So there!)

The paleo approach embraces the outdoors
Primal Beings loved nature and sunshine
So what is 'Primal Living', and where to start? There are a lot of holistic aspects to living Primal, but the beginning point for me is going to be what I eat. I am hoping this will be the most direct route to migraine and health improvements.
As a certified book worm, I find that knowledge and information delivered to my mind regularly is the fasted way to keep me motivated. With this is mind, I have gone back to school and am studying up on the Paleo diet, referring to Melissa Hartwig's Book 'It Starts with Food' and Mark Sisson's latest, 'The Primal Connection' to help inspire me further.
Tomorrow I will list for you what dietary changes I will need to make to go Paleo. I will also create a new page to track my changes and diarise how I am feeling during the process.
I hope that I will be documenting something positive in my life, but as the wise say, 'nothing changes if you change nothing'. Reckon, results aside, taking action is always worth doing.

Sunday 3 February 2013

The 'Giza' approach

What do Pyramids have to do with Migraines I hear you ask.... well probably not much if you are thinking of mystical Egyptian Princes with cat fetishes exerting influence over your head. I believe however, that there is a key link between achieving great improvements in your head health and the construction of a pyramid.
I have tried lots of tricky, technical and 'far out' things to try and get rid of migraines from my life. I have had my brain scanned, tried acupuncture (with some success), under tongue sprays, myriad preventative medications (with side affects from weight gain to night terrors), cranial sacral therapy, used chiropractors, physiotherapists and naturopaths.  Surprisingly enough after all this effort... I STILL get Migraines. Weird huh?

Looking back at this list, it is clear to me that I have been concentrating many of my efforts towards to top of the pyramid of migraine health. Perhaps it is time to start from the base.

Medical 
Intervention
Medecines
Mental Health
Physical Health
Basic: Sleep and Food

Now, to be clear, I am in no way a medical expert, and these are merely the ideas of a migraineur who has long thought about this issue.  This pyramid order approach is how I choose to crack on in the mean time, but I assume it will not suit everyone's situation. 

OK, all disclaimers aside, I am excited to have a reason to look hard at my diet and sleep. I am hoping improvements in diet will equal improvements in sleep as well.

From tomorrow I am going to have a look at the 'Paleo diet'. I don't know if the hype, expectations and reality will align, but I will take one for the team and give it a go!

Friday 1 February 2013

Ooops, I did it again

I just had a rather disturbing/ telling realisation. Earlier in this blog's history, i.e as long as last week ago (I know ancient history), I decided to take up some new activities to help with my migraines and anxiety issues.
Sadly, my realisation is that I have done absolutely NOTHING about it. Not a thing. Nada.
How could this happen? How could I announce to the world (well potentially the world) I was going to take action and yet do nothing?
After some panicked and recriminating thoughts, I have moved onto trying to turn this rather disappointing outcome around.
Perhaps I didn't set my self up for success? After all, apart from writing about what I was going to do in this blog I did no other planning to integrate the changes into my day? (Is this what I normally do?)
So here is the new deal, step two if you like, in making the changes stick.
For each idea I have to try as a part of this blog I am going to diarise it on another page, so step by step we can see what is happening.
Promise.
Keep posted to see my brand new 'Action Pages'.


Wednesday 30 January 2013

Making Work 'work' for the Migraine Sufferer

Regain your peace at work
What work stress?

Wouldn't it be wonderful to be able to approach your workplace with a light heart and a clear mind? No worrying about having to take days off for migraines (or children, or other ills), just feeling good about what needs to be done that day.


This dream may seem miles away for the average worker, let alone one who gets Migraine Headaches.   Speaking from the perspective of a current migraine sufferer and a former Manager of a medium size workplace, I believe there are a few simple steps the average person with a chronic illness can take to make their workplace more supportive of their struggle.
  •  Look for ways to highlight your contribution, not just the hours you have worked. Often high performers are just more effective than their peers, they are not necessarily the person who arrives at 6am and leaves at 10pm ,six days a week.
  • Be openly proactive about your efforts to improve your condition (and by this I don't mean become a 'Migraine Bore'). Subtly let your boss and colleagues know you are active about your endeavours to defeat the Migraine plague.
  • If your Boss is supportive and understanding of your condition and it's inherent difficulties, privately let them know you appreciate their assistance in your life.
  • Investigate flexible working arrangements, are there extra hours you can work when you are well to compensate for those when you are not?
  • Be supportive of your colleagues and their own issues, build a bank of good will, you will need to draw on it!
  • If you find yourself in a particularly bad migraine phase, discuss this with your boss, maybe they will be willing to let you take annual leave to recover, helping alleviate the stress and guilt of taking lots of days off. This makes it easier for your boss too as they have more time to arrange projects and other staffing to suit your absence.
  •  Remember to work on your own sense of self worth, it is hard to be effective at work if you are feeling guilty and unworthy because of your health.
  • Finally, make sure you have 'your ladder on the right wall'. By this I mean, where you are able, invest your time and effort into work you believe in and enjoy. It is much easier to fight for the right to work when you genuinely do want to be there.

Tuesday 29 January 2013

Demons at Work

When in the jungle, surrounded by hostile operatives, it is not really the time to start thinking about learning camouflage techniques or non lethal combat moves...

When your boss/ neighbour/ mother in law or land lord knocks on the door, again, not time to start the clean up, just so, when in the middle of a debilitating migraine spree it is not the time to think.... how can I cope with this?

Problem is, often we find ourselves with little choice but trying to manage our migraines from this very situation.
Picture this, you have already missed too many days this month at work, your guilt and stress levels are peaking and then..... another migraine hits. Your frustration and grief at the situation escalates as you envisage making yet another phone call to your employer letting them know you will not be in, again.

I bet this scenario seems familiar to many readers. As would the despair and hopelessness that often accompanies this situation.

Is there any way to manage this? On one side of the coin you are dealing with your bosses expectations and disappointment, and on the flip side you are probably angry with yourself because obviously it is all your fault.

winning at work with migraines
You can win at work
This very situation was my own ugly challenge for all the years I worked out of the home. I have a list of a few solutions I have explored, and some I have just thought of but not tried. With all of these ideas however, I believe none of them will work unless you can recognise your own personal 'migraine demons'.
These 'demons' are all the nasty beliefs you have internalised about yourself because you were silly enough to get migraines. These are the beliefs that make you repeat behaviours that have not worked for you, give up too early with treatments because you lack the belief things can change, avoid pro activity at work because you don't feel like a good employee.

If these demons retain the upper hand, nothing will change because they cripple your will and resolve.
Next time I get a migraine, or a cluster of them, I am planning on tackling these beliefs head on. If I can wipe away the 'stories' I have attached to my migraines I can move successfully onto removing them altogether from my life.
Perhaps like me, other migraine sufferers would benefit from strengthening their mental approach, carrying confidence and self belief into their workplaces instead of giving a free ride to their 'migraine burden'.